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2005 archives: Jan.Feb.Mar.Apr.May.Jun.Jul.Aug.Sep.Oct.Nov.Dec

January 2005

1.2

Week 5

You manky git. I would kick you, but I hate to get dog poo on my shoe. IThe difference between you and amoenbic dysentery is that the amoeba has some sort of intellect at least. Now, get off, get stuffed and go butt a stump . - Caustic Kowboy
Actually, the difference between me and an amoeba is that I am a multiple celled create that has great trouble finding ways to reproduce and an amoeda reproduces a-sexually at an astounding rate.

And you're damn right, if you kicked me, I would make it my personal mission to smear your foot in dog poo.

Get off, get stuff and go butt a stump? Is this what you crazy kids are saying these days? In my day, it was "Turn on, Tune In, Cop Out".... Oh, how times change.
Quality: Your score for Quality was 4Your score for Quality was 4Your score for Quality was 4Your score for Quality was 4 Originality: Your score for Originality was 4Your score for Originality was 4Your score for Originality was 4Your score for Originality was 4 Vulgarity: Your score for Vulgarity was 3Your score for Vulgarity was 3Your score for Vulgarity was 3
Overall: Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15 (75%)
Posted on Saturday, 5th February 2005
 
You are a fuck-monkey with the IQ of a small rodent. You breath smells of semen which leaves me to conclude that you worship the cock! - Noreturn
Fuck monkeys are small rodents. We live in a small glade on the border between Colombia and Brazil and worship a giant phallus.

You are correct in your assumption
Quality: Your score for Quality was 3Your score for Quality was 3Your score for Quality was 3 Originality: Your score for Originality was 4Your score for Originality was 4Your score for Originality was 4Your score for Originality was 4 Vulgarity: Your score for Vulgarity was 4Your score for Vulgarity was 4Your score for Vulgarity was 4Your score for Vulgarity was 4
Overall: Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15Your score for Overall was 15 (75%)
Posted on Saturday, 5th February 2005
 
After watching American television, I heard that youdecided that, 'getting laid' sounded like a nice idea; so she crawled up a hen's bottom and waited - Daniel
So, I watched American TV, yes? And then decided that getting laid would be a good idea... I'm following so far.

Where I lose you is at "so she crawled up a hen's bottom and waited".

Why would she do it? And who is she? And how does my watching TV and thinking things affect her?
Quality: Your score for Quality was 2Your score for Quality was 2 Originality: Your score for Originality was 4Your score for Originality was 4Your score for Originality was 4Your score for Originality was 4 Vulgarity: Your score for Vulgarity was 1
Overall: Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9 (45%)
Posted on Sunday, 30th January 2005
 
If you were a pirate you'd never say "arr thar she blows" because you'd never BE blown... and also you'd not be cool enough to be a pirate that said anything, you'd just be swabbing the deck, I doubt you'd even be a "me hearties" I reckon you'd "hoist" the captain's "Mainbrace" and give it to him up the pupper. - Cineworld Jesus
Well, if I wasn't blown, I would be "thar she blows" because it wouldn't be "here she blows"...

Otherwise, I would not have made a good pirate. I lack the capacity to ruthlessly murder and pilage and I have no... um... knees.
Quality: Your score for Quality was 4Your score for Quality was 4Your score for Quality was 4Your score for Quality was 4 Originality: Your score for Originality was 5 (You get stars if you do really well!)Your score for Originality was 5 (You get stars if you do really well!)Your score for Originality was 5 (You get stars if you do really well!)Your score for Originality was 5 (You get stars if you do really well!)Your score for Originality was 5 (You get stars if you do really well!) Vulgarity: Your score for Vulgarity was 3Your score for Vulgarity was 3Your score for Vulgarity was 3
Overall: Your score for Overall was 16Your score for Overall was 16Your score for Overall was 16Your score for Overall was 16Your score for Overall was 16Your score for Overall was 16Your score for Overall was 16Your score for Overall was 16Your score for Overall was 16Your score for Overall was 16Your score for Overall was 16Your score for Overall was 16Your score for Overall was 16Your score for Overall was 16Your score for Overall was 16Your score for Overall was 16 (80%)
Posted on Sunday, 30th January 2005
 
RANT RAVE, I LOVE SWINDON, YOU HATE IT ARRGH I KILL YOU, I WORK FOR THE EVENING ADVERTISER AND I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE, WE ARE ALL POWERFUL ARRRGHH OHHH SPOOKY TYPE NOISES.... I love you - Barrie Hudson
Um... Okay... I'm guessing you're not Barrie Hudson but it's no doubt cause for another pointless article some time in the future...
Quality: Your score for Quality was 3Your score for Quality was 3Your score for Quality was 3 Originality: Your score for Originality was 5 (You get stars if you do really well!)Your score for Originality was 5 (You get stars if you do really well!)Your score for Originality was 5 (You get stars if you do really well!)Your score for Originality was 5 (You get stars if you do really well!)Your score for Originality was 5 (You get stars if you do really well!) Vulgarity: You scored nothing for Vulgarity
Overall: Your score for Overall was 11Your score for Overall was 11Your score for Overall was 11Your score for Overall was 11Your score for Overall was 11Your score for Overall was 11Your score for Overall was 11Your score for Overall was 11Your score for Overall was 11Your score for Overall was 11Your score for Overall was 11 (55%)
Posted on Sunday, 30th January 2005
 
now busted have split your life is just shit - Cineworld Jesus
However will you insult me without Busted to rhyme about? Ah, McFly are still around...
Quality: Your score for Quality was 1 Originality: Your score for Originality was 3Your score for Originality was 3Your score for Originality was 3 Vulgarity: Your score for Vulgarity was 1
Overall: Your score for Overall was 7Your score for Overall was 7Your score for Overall was 7Your score for Overall was 7Your score for Overall was 7Your score for Overall was 7Your score for Overall was 7 (35%)
Posted on Sunday, 30th January 2005
 

Week 3

Don't mess with me, u bag of bollox, or i'll rip out ur balls and turn them into castanets. Put the buggers to some use... - Buttplug
Good luck trying to get a clacking sound out of my dismembered bollocks. You're much more likely to get a squishy noise and a messy hand.
Quality: Your score for Quality was 2Your score for Quality was 2 Originality: Your score for Originality was 2Your score for Originality was 2 Vulgarity: Your score for Vulgarity was 3Your score for Vulgarity was 3Your score for Vulgarity was 3
Overall: Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9 (45%)
Posted on Wednesday, 19th January 2005
 
knock knock whos there? edna edna who? ed na knickers on - carley
Haha. Edna.
Quality: You scored nothing for Quality Originality: Your score for Originality was 1 Vulgarity: You scored nothing for Vulgarity
Overall: Your score for Overall was 1 (5%)
Posted on Wednesday, 19th January 2005
 
penis - Anonymous
Your fascination with the male genitalia leads me to conclude that the Freudian theory that you are envious of your mother in the sexual and emotional relationship that she has with your father is applicable to your case....

Or at least, that is about the best response I can come up with to such a shite insult.
Quality: You scored nothing for Quality Originality: You scored nothing for Originality Vulgarity: You scored nothing for Vulgarity
Overall: You scored nothing for Overall (0%)
Posted on Wednesday, 19th January 2005
 
if i were as pathetic as yourself, i'd slit my wrist...wait...i did that...if i were such a loser as yourself, i'd take a bunch of prozac and end it all...wait, i did that too...I GOT IT ! ... you're as fucked up as i am ! - seretur
Yeah, but I have a website to testify to it. And I'm not really fucked up, just pathetic.
Quality: Your score for Quality was 3Your score for Quality was 3Your score for Quality was 3 Originality: Your score for Originality was 2Your score for Originality was 2 Vulgarity: Your score for Vulgarity was 2Your score for Vulgarity was 2
Overall: Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9Your score for Overall was 9 (45%)
Posted on Wednesday, 19th January 2005
 
1.2
2005 archives: Jan.Feb.Mar.Apr.May.Jun.Jul.Aug.Sep.Oct.Nov.Dec