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I'm sure I haven't thought anything about sex that hasn't be thought by the numerous men that preceded me.

Posted by Mzebonga on Saturday, 22nd December 2001

"To eat a Chiquita you've gotta grow the banana"

Posted by Mzebonga on Wednesday, 10th July 2002

What the hell would I know about it?

Posted by Mzebonga on Tuesday, 14th December 2004

Copping A Feel

I'd love to come out on George's side for the copping a feel plea: it is degrading and objectifying women. It's also intensely satisfying. Who doesn't love to clasp a nubile, young female close to them?

However, there is a point where it passes from slightly pervy to needlessly gratuitous/sex offender levels. It is a line that I plan never to cross. Mostly because women don't embrace me no matter how much money I wave at them.

Posted by Mzebonga on Tuesday, 5th July 2005

When people hug me, that's what I think they're trying to do. Unless it's gramma. I know she just likes hugging.

If it's a truly friendly hug, then I much prefer that over the kissing on the cheek. If you're my friend and you go to hug me, then I should be ok with it once a week or so. If I don't know you and you try, you will end up crying and bleeding.

Chicks who squeal and hug every time they see each other, well that's very annoying and they should shut up.

Posted by JCP on Tuesday, 5th July 2005


1. Get down and dirty.
2. Do the bad thing.
3. Get biblical.
4. Act like the rabbits
5. Jump your bones.
6. Bump pelvises.
7. Bump and grind.
8. Free exchange of bodily fluids.
9. Y'know... Hurr hurr hurr... Like... Do it
10. Knock knees

Why come up with this crap when any from a selection of single syllable words will do?

Posted by Mzebonga on Thursday, 8th September 2005


As a point of fact, if anyone wants a signed photo of me over which to abuse oneself, please feel free to contact the website, it would make us all laugh for days on end.

Posted by Mzebonga on Wednesday, 10th May 2006


Everybody is reading this as well all have a fixation on nudity and all which that implies. Would you like to see me naked? Are you thinking about me naked? Ew!! Ew!! Ew!! Don't do that!

Posted by Mzebonga on Thursday, 21st March 2002


You got a huge set of knockers, I got a digital video camera.
I got a digital video camera, your boyfriend has a massive wanger.

Let's make more money than JCP.

Posted by George on Tuesday, 13th September 2005