To quote "The Creator" and settle this dispute:
MZEBONGA: [MM-zee-BONG-ga]. noun. The answer to the question.
Philosophers and scientists have long since pondered the precise nature of the question.
so there i am trying to make some rice... it's yummy when you have sauce all over it and can fill you up... so yea... there i am making rice and thinking how enjoyable it will be... in marches Mzebonga being all 'hey whatca doing? can i have some? is it done yet?' and sticking his fingers into the pot... so i slap his hand away and tell him to just WAIT... i mean there is enough for us both and he's in my face saying NOW NOW NOW NOW... so i bitch slap him and figure that he'd get the point and just WAIT... but oh no... he gets all weepy/crying and blubbers into the rice... what the HELL i say... i try to shove him out of the way but now he's got his hands in the rice pot and is scooping some out... as he's sobbing he's scooping the half cooked rice into his mouth... so FINE... i shove his head in the pot and scream I HOPE YOU BURN IN HELL MZEBONGA... YOU AND THE RICE…
You know I think it's time that I shared with you what this alleged "Mzebonga" is really like. I'm not sure if this post will stay up once he's awake (and actually reads this), but I just feel I need to reveal some things about him while he's blissfully unaware.
Things you should know about Mzebonga:
1. He doesn't even LIKE the color green, no matter what he says. He told me that he figured it was the closest he would get to smearing snot on people's monitors. This is why he's always sending links to everyone to come visit his site.
2. If I post something he doesn't like, I get death threats emailed to me every 5 minutes. He can't spell KILL correctly, and that's very annoying.
3. It's ALWAYS about the West Wing with him. ALWAYS.
4. He has a giant afro. You wouldn't BELIEVE how massive it is. I think birds live in it. It bobs around when he’s making faces at me on his webcam.
5. During the summer, when he’s bored, he goes around at night and creates crop circles. Seriously, go look up how many ‘appear’ each summer in the UK. He brags about them all the time.
Thank you and good night.
About 5 years ago, somebody I knew gave me a Mr Men keyring of Mr Perfect. It's been pinned on my notice board for that period of time and I'd mostly forgotten about it.
I'm worried because I'm not sure if there was some sort of message involved with it...
I get the impression that it was meant to imply that I think I'm perfect. Moreover, I'm slightly worried that I do actually give that impression.
He's a bit OCD on the way this site is run.
"Must... create... trivia..."
He is so insular. And quite frankly he should be very, very careful about any statements relating to gene pools. He is a quasi-academic with (and I agree with my cyber buddy George here) - definite OCD tendencies. We (the aforementioned George and I), are generous enough to patronize this space, however, it would appear we do not adhere to the blueprint. FUCK IT! We'll do what we want. "Cos we want to. Cos we want to!"
He used to be called Tiki, but that's only cause he couldn't spell Mzebonga.