They lie to you about Canada. Canada is hot and humid. I brought my woolly jumper and snowboard and they are useless here.
Sure in southern Ontario it's becoming Little USA and that sucks a lot, but the rest of it is cool. And there is a LOT more to it than just shitty old southern Ontario.
I went to Canada! Canda was cool!
I'm going back again! YAY!
Canada is a big place with relatively few people living there.
I put this down to false advertising that tells people not to move there and that everyone there is an ignorant, arrogant Frenchy.
You don't want to move here.
It's awful and cold the WHOLE time.
We live in igloos.
We have sled dog teams and cry when they die.
We all speak French and like to beat those who don't with dead baby seals.
Stay the fuck away from Canada!
Next year, due to an influx of people wanting to study mystery and melodrama. I have been forced to study Canadian Literature. I opened the letter this morning, read it, and the first thing I thought about was "Fucking hell. What if they think like JCP". Personally this thought scares me more than anything has ever done previously.
I'm not sure my stomach could handle a year of "I Like swords, stab stab, pizza is nice, oh look it's a storm, 750 posts like 750 monkies went to france to start the civil war". I'm EXTREMELY scared.
QUICK BRITAIN! LET'S MOVE!
That's where I am right now.
And yes, it is the capital of Canada.
Alanis was born in Ottawa, so regardless of any diseases/bodily fluids that may have been spilt on the hospital beds, I'm going to lick them all.
Still here and even Mzebonga has begged me to stalk Alanis while I'm here. Basically, I'd hang out with her (maybe more as she is freaky and I like that) but I'm not going to hunt her down and force her to spend time with me. I'm just not THAT kind of evil. George gets points for making me both cringe and laugh though.