BogBanter is what happens when you give a small number typewriters to a similar number of monkeys: far from the works of Shakespeare, you get this tripe.
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Outing the rest of you and your drinking problems

JCP Discusses the drinking habits of everyone on BogGoblin (from the All About section)
Ran from Thursday, 22nd December 2005 to Thursday, 29th December 2005 (7 days)
Suggested by JCP on Thursday, 22nd December 2005

JCP (Thursday, 22nd December 2005, 00:00) : Yes I've sort of pushed everyone else’s posts to the bottom of this page but let's face it, I'm probably the only one here who posts while partially sober.
This means I make SOME sort of sense MOST of the time.
If you believed THAT then you're drunk.
What IS it about this website that makes people drink?
I blame Mzebonga mostly.
And yes, I'm completely sober right now.
Scary isn't it?

Festus (Thursday, 22nd December 2005, 00:00) : Hey! Like - uh - Happy Birthday!!
I tried to read all of your posts but ran out of time!!!!
Besides Mzebonga gets shitty about "chat"; so I will not talk to you again!!
Hee hee hee!

JCP (Thursday, 22nd December 2005, 00:00) : DEAR GEORGE AND FESTUS,

How are you? Tell me what's going on in your lives.
Ask for anything fun for xmas?!
I got a camera. We should get together for a group photo. It's probably best to just fly me in for this so I'll wait for you to send me my tickets in the mail.

Your chat friend,
P.S - Bring on the wrath Mzebonga, consider it my xmas gift to you.

George (Thursday, 22nd December 2005, 00:00) : I am fine thankyou JCP, how the devil are you?

In my life right now there is one thing and one thing only. Salmon.

I asked for a PSP, mum thinks this is a bad idea and decided to get me a "Real Present" I hope it's good, her husband's life depends on it. YOU HEAR ME DAD?

I think we should all stand together and look pretty, except Mzebonga, he can take the photo, if his chubby fingers can handle a button.

I can't afford your tickets, so I stuck them on Mzebonga's credit card.

How about you Festy? You getting anything cool from Mzebonga? I think the only thing I'll get from him is a kick in the dick when he sees this post.



JCP (Thursday, 22nd December 2005, 00:00) : I am well and looking forward to some time off.
Thank you for putting through the tickets on Mzebonga's card!
I will see you all soon and NO Mzebonga isn't allowed to touch my new camera. We'll have it be on auto timer.
I'll see your xmas gifts when I arrive George, make sure there is hot pizza there to be eaten or I shall be grumpy.

Love and punches to the face,

Mzebonga (Thursday, 22nd December 2005, 00:00) : I plan to rub it all over my groin when she isn't looking.

JCP (Friday, 23rd December 2005, 00:00) : I will BREAK YOUR FACE before you even get NEAR it.
And then I will photograph your bleeding face and post it online so we may ALL laugh at you.
But chicks dig scars so it will work in your favour.
YOU OWE ME, yet again.

Festus (Saturday, 24th December 2005, 00:00) : Solitude. Isolation.
Whinge, whinge; moan, moan.
Bloody hell - I think I would rather been on my own!
Roll on January 3rd!!!

Festus (Saturday, 24th December 2005, 00:00) : Okay!
The next one of you buggers to bleat about YOUR OWN pathetic failings - I'm outta here!
Moan about the fact that shit (usually) stinks or that Bin Laden has parasites by all means; but no more self indulgent whining!
I do not have any doubt that you'd be glad to see me go but that does not bother me one fucking bit!

Mzebonga (Sunday, 25th December 2005, 00:00) : Let it go forth that this section of BogGoblin is forever more to be a Bastion of moaning about life and swearing at morons.

It is law.

Festus (Sunday, 25th December 2005, 00:00) : If that means no more self-indulgent whining, then I am in absolute agreement!!!
Look - we got it good guys. We have Boggoblin on which to purge our sorry-ass souls!! (Amongst other things)
Live my children - live!!!

JCP (Sunday, 25th December 2005, 00:00) : You, sir, are NOT the boss of us!
Not that Mzebonga is either.
Basically, all of you should obey ME.
Without our bitching and moaning, we've got pretty much nothing but drunken rambling.
Build me a pyramid.

Festus (Sunday, 25th December 2005, 00:00) : Hey - there's Jack-Shit wrong with drunken ramblin!!!
The moaning and bitching; well that just doesn't work!
I'll obey - but only if . . .
Therein the Pyramid lies the tomb, I ain't for dying hun!!!!
I guess I forgot about "free speech"; but it sometimes sucks so very bad!!

JCP (Thursday, 29th December 2005, 00:00) : Festus, you're in charge of etching in the hieroglyphs. Mzebonga and George would blither on far too long. In fact, I want them thrown in the pyramid before it's sealed so their screams of death will echo within and scare away the locals for a while.

Long live drunken rambling!